REAR, n. In American military matters, that exposed part of the army that is nearest to Congress.
"Why does the Air Force need expensive new bombers? Have the people we've been bombing over the years been complaining?"
"We have women in the military, but they don't put us in the front lines. They don't know if we can fight, if we can kill. I think we can. All the general has to do is walk over to the women and say, 'You see the enemy over there? They say you look fat in those uniforms.'"
"I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service."
"Military justice is to justice what military music is to music."
Army food: the spoils of war
"When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship."
"The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations."
"The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his."
"It will be a great day when our schools have all the money they need, and our air force has to have a bake-sale to buy a bomber."
"I am not fond of speaking about politics because I don't have in my possession an army of 200,000 soldiers."
"My fellow Americans. I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography."
"Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait."
VALOR, n. A soldierly compound of vanity, duty and the gambler's hope.
"Why have you halted?" roared the commander of a division and Chickamauga, who had ordered a charge. "Move forward, sir, at once."
"General," said the commander of the delinquent brigade, "I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy."/p>