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FUNNY VIOLENCE QUOTES

You need have no fear of laughing at this page of funny violence quotes or getting stuffed in your locker over a few funny quotes on school violence. We hope you can unclench your fist long enough to chuckle at these rare humorous quotes about violence and quotes on violence.

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Funny Violence Quotes . . .
GENERAL

"Violence is the way stupid people try to level the playing field."

John Gregory Dunne

"Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although sometimes you have to hunt around."

Dave Barry

"Ninety-eight percent of American homes have TV sets, which means the people in the other 2% have to generate their own sex and violence."

Franklin P. Jones

"Football is a mistake. It combines the two worst elements of American life. Violence and committee meetings."

George F. Will

"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me."

Hunter S. Thompson

"I can't see the point in the theatre. All that sex and violence. I get enough of that at home. Apart from the sex, of course."

Baldrick, from Blackadder


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Quotes On School Violence (Funny) ...
SCHOOL VIOLENCE

"In the school I went to, they asked a kid to prove the law of gravity and he threw the teacher out of the window."

Rodney Dangerfield

"I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like: What I'm going to be if I grow up."

Lenny Bruce

"My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary section."

Norm Crosby

"Show me a man who has enjoyed his school days and I'll show you a bully and a bore."

Robert Morely

"I was the naughty kid that the teachers liked. I bullied a kid in the 1st year when I was in the 2nd, who then hit puberty like a plane crash and grew into a gorilla who bullied me when he was in the 4th year and I was in the 5th. That's Karma."

Simon Pegg

"Remember, I'm the kind of kid who used to get stuffed into a locker by school bullies. I've never felt like I'm a big star at any level of my life."

Winona Ryder


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THE EVER-POPULAR TORTURED SEGUE

 

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Funny Violence Quotes
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FUNNY VIOLENCE QUOTE

If you know of a funny violence quote that I missed, please email it to me. Provide the text of the quote and who said it (and, if you have it, a web reference where we can verify the text and the spelling of the person's name, etc.). So... email me a quote. Thanks!

 

Feed Your Brain!
AUDIO CLIPS
THE VIOLENCE OF EMPIRE

CATEGORY:  FINANCIAL — 01.JUL.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good Guns and Butter

Catherine Austin Fitts on Wealth Harvesting and the Black Budget — Financial guru Catherine Austin Fitts talks explains how she came up with the figure of $40 trillion in wealth stolen from the general public in the last 30 years. Topics include... how they did it; who "they" are; what they are likely using the money for; the Financial Coup d'Etat; privatizing of government budget management; history and organization of the financial system since World War II; the Exchange Stabilization Fund, a weapon managed by the New York Fed; the future world of digital currencies; why the bubbles and financial schemes are far too large to be explained by incompetence or corruption.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   1:00:00

GP comment:  Lots of great speculation here, though much of it is indeed speculation. And she doesn't have it quite right on the budget stuff—-there's the normal government budget world, in which dutiful accountants, both govvies and contractors, monitor the funds down to the penny. Then there is the world of "off budget" items and black budgets, into which trillions flow.... and go missing.

Original Show Pub Date: 25.Jun.2014

CATEGORY:  FINANCIAL, EMPIRE — 24.JUN.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good C-Realm Podcast

Notions of a New Economy — At the CommonBound 2014 gathering, KMO interviews guests on the topic of shifting to a sustainable economy. Guests are NEC president Bob Massie; Chuck Collins of the Institute for Policy Studies; and Lauren Hudson of Solidarity NYC. All three conversations touch on technology, messaging, and what constitutes effective action in the movement to foster a just transition to a new economic reality and a political process that works for people, not plutocrats.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   1:07:57

GP comment:  It's always tempting to dash the ship of good hope on the rocks of reality, but the speakers here do get into some of the knotty issues that go with daunting goals like a "new economy."

Original Show Pub Date: 18.Jun.2014

CATEGORY:  EMPIRE — 20.JUN.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good Diet Soap Podcast

The Imperial Risk — Margaret Kimberley and Douglas Lain discuss US imperialism. Topics include Ukraine, mainstream media, Obama the uber-imperialist, and capitalism as a game of Risk.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   1:00:00

GP comment:  Takeaway line: "Democrats or Republicans, you're still going to get imperialism."

Original Show Pub Date: 07.Jun.2014

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GP CARTOONS RELATED TO
Violence

 
Violent Video Game Joke link; thumb of boy playing video game VIOLENT VIDEO GAMES TRYING TO BE MORE EDUCATIONAL?
Violent Video Game Joke
 
Hollywood Television Violence Joke link; thumb of man watching violence on television CRIME AND VIOLENCE ON TV - INDUSTRY SOLUTION
Hollywood Television Violence Joke
 
School Violence cartoon link; thumb of principal SIGNS YOUR SCHOOL IS CRACKING DOWN ON VIOLENCE
School Violence Cartoon

thumb from Crime of the Century album cover

SUPERTRAMP —
“SCHOOL” ... AND THE CRIME OF THE CENTURY

After school is over,
You're playing in the park ...
"Don't be out too late,
Don't let it get too dark!"
They tell you not to hang around
And learn what life's about;
And grow up just like them,
Won't let you work it out,
And you're full of doubt ...

"School" is one of Supertramp's best songs, from one of their best albums. Other top songs include the title track, "Dreamer", "Hide In Your Shell", and "Bloody Well Right". See full GP review of Crime of the Century.

Amazon options:
-- SONG: "School"  ( MP3 )
-- ALBUM: Crime of the Century
    ( CD  |  MP3 Album )

       
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