FUNNY SPRING QUOTES

"Spring is nature's way of saying, 'Let's party!'"

— Robin Williams

"Winter lingered so long in the lap of Spring that it occasioned a great deal of talk."

— Bill Nye

"Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush."

— Doug Larson

"Spring is the time of the year, when it is summer in the sun and winter in the shade."

— Charles Dickens

"In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours."

— Mark Twain

"Spring being a tough act to follow, God created June."

— Al Bernstein

"In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt."

— Margaret Atwood

A little Madness in the Spring
Is wholesome even for the King.

— Emily Dickinson

Indoors or out, no one relaxes
In March, that month of wind and taxes.
The wind will presently disappear;
The taxes last us all the year.

— Ogden Nash

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From The Drew Carey Show

Mimi Bobeck: "Ah, spring. When a young man's fancy turns my stomach. "

From The Red Green Show

Red Green: "It is spring. Tadpoles swim in a stagnant pond, surrounded by floating lilies and water snakes. You're tempted to destroy their world with men and equipment, to dry up the swamp and kill the animals. But what the heck? You don't go down in the basement that often anyway."

From Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Narrator: "A year passed: winter changed into spring, spring changed into summer, summer changed back into winter, and winter gave spring and summer a miss and went straight on into autumn... until one day..."

From Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Buffy [to two vampires, as she's slaying them]:
"A spring breeze tosses the leaves aside, and again, you're registering as Mr. and Mrs. Big Pile of Dust."

From Frasier

Daphne: "I suppose all brothers are like that. Mine certainly were. Everything was a contest! Who could the run the fastest, jump the highest. They even had this strange one where they'd take little brother Michael, put him in a potato sack and see who could roll him the farthest over the frozen lake out back. They loved that game! Until that year the spring thaw set in early and poor Michael went right through the ice. Ooh, they caught hell for that one, they did. Caught it worse a week later when Michael's toe finally fell off. Michael cried and cried until they told him to put it under his pillow for the toe fairy! And then when he got five quid for it, why it was all they could do to stop him from sawing off the rest of them!"

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"I played a heap of snow in a school play. I was under a sheet, and crawled out when spring came. I often say I'll never reach the same artistic level again."

— Stellan Skarsgard

"Don't forget it's daylight savings time. You spring forward, then you fall back. It's like Robert Downey Jr. getting out of bed."

— David Letterman

"Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond."

— Ambrose Bierce

"The only thing that could spoil a day was people. People were always the limiters of happiness except for the very few that were as good as spring itself."

— Ernest Hemingway

"Chicago is an October sort of city, even in spring."

— Nelson Algren

"The first day of spring was once the time for taking the young virgins into the fields, there in dalliance to set an example in fertility for nature to follow. Now we just set the clocks an hour ahead and change the oil in the crankcase."

— E.B. White

"People ask me what I do in winter when there's no baseball. I'll tell you what I do. I stare out the window and wait for spring."

— Rogers Hornsby