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FUNNY BOYFRIEND QUOTES, HUMOROUS QUOTATIONS ABOUT BOY FRIENDS QUOTES

FUNNY BOYFRIEND QUOTES

 
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Funny Boyfriend Quotes . . .
GENERAL

"My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to."

Rita Rudner

"What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds."

Cindy Gardner

"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend—and he's a priest."

Erma Bombeck

"My boyfriend and I live together, which means we don't have sex—ever. Now that the milk is free, we've both become lactose intolerant."

Margaret Cho

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful, hate me because your boyfriend thinks I am."

Unknown

"My marriage is on the rocks again; yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend."

Rodney Dangerfield

"My boyfriend calls me 'princess', but I think of myself more along the lines of 'monkey' and 'retard'."

Alicia Silverstone


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Funny Boyfriend Quotes . . .
A LITTLE NAUGHTY

"I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away."

Phyllis Diller

"I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV."

Tracy Smith

"My mom always complains about my lack of a boyfriend. Well, next time she asks, I'm going to tell her I'm dating two different guys—Mr Duracell and Mr Energizer."

Michelle Landry


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Funny Boyfriends Quotes . . .
FROM HOLLYWOOD

"When Charles Dickens wrote 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,' I believe he must have been having an affair with his married ex-boyfriend."

Carrie Bradshaw
    (Sarah Jessica Parker's character on "Sex and the City")

"Everything I buy is vintage and smells funny. Maybe that's why I don't have a boyfriend."

Lucy Liu

"Save a boyfriend for a rainy day—and another, in case it doesn't rain."

Mae West

"It's a job - someone's gotta do it [kiss Jennifer Aniston]. The reality is, Jennifer and I can do our job well because we truly are friends. But when the day's over, she goes home to her boyfriend and I go home to a magazine."

David Schwimmer (Ross Gellar on "Friends")

 

Funny Boyfriend Quotes
COMM. CENTER & RELATED STUFF

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Funny Quote subject list

Jokes/Cartoons (General)

THE EVER-POPULAR TORTURED SEGUE

If your better half is taking up so much of your time that you don't have much left, you can get a concise, fun fill-up of global warming history with this global warming comic strip ....

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FUNNY BOYFRIEND QUOTE

If you know of a funny boyfriend quote that I missed, please email it to me. Provide the text of the quote and who said it; and, if you have it, a reference where we can verify the text and the spelling of the person's name (a web page address, Bartlett's, etc.). So... email me a quote. Thanks!

 

Feed Your Brain!
AUDIO CLIPS
ON HEALTH ISSUES

CATEGORY:  HEALTH — 30.SEP.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good One Radio Network

Jess Armine, The Sherlock Holmes of Chronic Diseases — Jess Armine practices functional medicine and has been a health care provider for over three decades, now specializing in difficult-to-treat cases. Topics here include ... bio-individualized medicine; how the Standard of Care rules make some docs practice bad medicine; IV therapies; the biochemistry of the body; Leaky Gut Syndrome and rebuilding the gut to reduce inflammation.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   1:04:00

GP comment:  This is a blizzard of insights on how the body really works and the subtle systemic problems that can be difficult to diagnose and treat. One note: He confuses hybridized wheat with GMO wheat. The latter is not in production.

Original Show Pub Date: 23.Sep.2014

CATEGORY:  HEALTH — 26.SEP.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good Infectious Myth

The CDC Vaccine Scandal — A vaccine scandal erupted recently at the CDC, with a CDC whistleblower leaking data about the suppression of the connection between the MMR vaccine and autism. Dr. Toni Bark explains why we can now say that the CDC's claim that it was unaware of any connection between MMR and autism is false, that it has been lying to US citizens to maintain the illusion that all vaccines are safe and have no significant risk of side effects.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   59:17

GP comment:  The vaccine issue is a bit tricky, as we see when Barks condemns the CDC and certain vaccines but is supportive of other vaccines. This is as it should be.

Original Show Pub Date: 02.Sep.2014

CATEGORY:  HEALTH — 08.SEP.2014

Rating: 2 of 5 - OK; if you've got the time... Awakening to Conscious Co-Creation

The Chi of Change — Is there a way out of anxiety, depression, overeating, fear, phobias, addiction, insomnia, trauma, and low self-esteem—without taking pills? Peter Field will explain how your subconscious mind has been programmed to make you feel the way you feel; how these programs can be rapidly changed through the right kind of hypnotherapy; how your most difficult feelings and emotions can help you change your life for the better.; and how you can live a balanced, meaningful life and move forward in confidence and harmony with yourself and your world.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   56:12

GP comment:  Pretty much a straight-up discussion of hypno-psychotherapy. The cases discussed are interesting enough, but I was hoping for more insights into WHY hypnotherapy works.

Original Show Pub Date: 18.Jun.2014

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