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FUNNY BOYFRIEND QUOTES, HUMOROUS QUOTATIONS ABOUT BOY FRIENDS QUOTES

FUNNY BOYFRIEND QUOTES

 
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Funny Boyfriend Quotes . . .
GENERAL

"My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to."

Rita Rudner

"What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds."

Cindy Gardner

"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend—and he's a priest."

Erma Bombeck

"My boyfriend and I live together, which means we don't have sex—ever. Now that the milk is free, we've both become lactose intolerant."

Margaret Cho

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful, hate me because your boyfriend thinks I am."

Unknown

"My marriage is on the rocks again; yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend."

Rodney Dangerfield

"My boyfriend calls me 'princess', but I think of myself more along the lines of 'monkey' and 'retard'."

Alicia Silverstone


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Funny Boyfriend Quotes . . .
A LITTLE NAUGHTY

"I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away."

Phyllis Diller

"I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV."

Tracy Smith

"My mom always complains about my lack of a boyfriend. Well, next time she asks, I'm going to tell her I'm dating two different guys—Mr Duracell and Mr Energizer."

Michelle Landry


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Funny Boyfriends Quotes . . .
FROM HOLLYWOOD

"When Charles Dickens wrote 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,' I believe he must have been having an affair with his married ex-boyfriend."

Carrie Bradshaw
    (Sarah Jessica Parker's character on "Sex and the City")

"Everything I buy is vintage and smells funny. Maybe that's why I don't have a boyfriend."

Lucy Liu

"Save a boyfriend for a rainy day—and another, in case it doesn't rain."

Mae West

"It's a job - someone's gotta do it [kiss Jennifer Aniston]. The reality is, Jennifer and I can do our job well because we truly are friends. But when the day's over, she goes home to her boyfriend and I go home to a magazine."

David Schwimmer (Ross Gellar on "Friends")

 

Funny Boyfriend Quotes
COMM. CENTER & RELATED STUFF

SIMILAR CATEGORIES

Funny Personality Quotes

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Funny Valentine's Quotes

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Funny Quote subject list

Jokes/Cartoons (General)

THE EVER-POPULAR TORTURED SEGUE

If your better half is taking up so much of your time that you don't have much left, you can get a concise, fun fill-up of global warming history with this global warming comic strip ....

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FUNNY BOYFRIEND QUOTE

If you know of a funny boyfriend quote that I missed, please email it to me. Provide the text of the quote and who said it; and, if you have it, a reference where we can verify the text and the spelling of the person's name (a web page address, Bartlett's, etc.). So... email me a quote. Thanks!

 

Feed Your Brain!
AUDIO CLIPS
ON HEALTH ISSUES

CATEGORY:  HEALTH — 24.JUL.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good One Radio Network

Understanding the Connections Between the Cancer Protocols of Gerson, Revici, Burzynski, Hoxsey, and Others — There are many people who claim to have THE alternative therapy that can cure cancer. Some of these practitioners present compelling evidence. But what is the meta theme? What are the overarching biological principles that cut through the basket of most-promising therapies? Steve Mitchell has spent countless hours reviewing medical literature about these therapies and talks here about what we know and what we don't know.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   1:03:33

GP comment:  Mitchell is not a medical man, but he has a sharp mind and serves as an honest evaluator of the various therapies, whether they work in practice, and WHY they work.

Original Show Pub Date: 08.Jul.2014

CATEGORY:  HEALTH — 09.JUL.2014

Rating: 5 of 5 - Must-listening! One Radio Network

The Disease Delusion — Dr. Jeffrey Bland explains the principles of functional medicine and how it is designed to consider the biochemistry of the body as well as the individual quirks that we all have. It avoids the standard Western medicine "disease model," which largely treats symptoms while ignoring the underlying malfunction that is causing the problems.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   1:01:07

GP comment:  I read one of Bland's books about 15 years ago. It, along with books by two of his peers, Leo Galland and Sydney Baker, completely changed the way I view health and health care.

Original Show Pub Date: 17.Jun.2014

CATEGORY:  HEALTH — 27.JUN.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good Quirks and Quarks

Malnutrition and the Microbiome — One of the tragedies of malnutrition in children is that the problems don't end when the hunger stops. A new study has shown that the microbial communities in the gut of children who experience malnutrition seem to be compromised over the long term and don't recover even after therapy and a return to a normal diet. Microbiologist Jeff Gordon led a team that found that the "microbiome" of these children seemed to be stuck in an immature state—not developing as it does under normal circumstances. This means that the children probably can't digest food properly, and leads to long term health issues, including stunted growth, a damaged immune system, and even neurological problems. Dr. Gordon hopes that understanding this problem better might lead to more effective therapies that take the gut microbiome into account.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   10:11

GP comment:  Much of the info here is also applicable to Westerners having health issues related to gut malfunction.

Original Show Pub Date: 07.Jun.2014

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