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FUNNY PIGEON QUOTES, FUNNY PIGEON QUOTATIONS, HUMOROUS QUOTES PIDGEONS

FUNNY PIGEON QUOTES

 
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Funny Pigeon Quotes . . .
GENERAL

 
 

"I don't go to the gym or practice yoga. And the closest thing I have to a nutritionist is the Carlsberg Beer Company. I just have the appetite of a pigeon."

— Colin Farrell

 
   
 
 

"Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue."

— Dilbert [Scott Adams]

 
   
 
 

"France has found a unique way of controlling its unwanted critter population. They have done this by giving unwanted animals like snails, pigeons, and frogs fancy names, thus transforming common backyard pests into expensive delicacies. These are then served to gullible tourists, who will eat anything they can't pronounce."

— Chris Harris

 
   
 
 

"The only difference between a pigeon and the American farmer today is that a pigeon can still make a deposit on a John Deere."

— Jim Hightower

 
   
 
 

"I think people should mate for life, like pigeons or Catholics."

— Woody Allen

 
 

Funny Pigeon Quotes . . .
FROM THE WORLD OF POLITICS

 
 

Have you ever noticed:
When you're feeling really good,
There's always a pigeon
That'll come shit on your hood;
Or you're feeling your freedom
And the world's off your back—
Some cowboy from Texas
Starts his own war in Iraq.

— John Prine

 
   
 
 

"I already shred all my mail. What am I supposed to do now? Use pay phones? Smoke signals? Train pigeons? There's no such thing as privacy anymore."

— Dennis Adams

 
   
 
 

"I don't mind being a symbol but I don't want to become a monument. There are monuments all over the Parliament Buildings and I've seen what the pigeons do to them."

— Tommy Douglas

 
 

Funny Pigeon Quotes That Are
CURIOUSLY FUNNY

 
 

"A man must keep his mouth open a long while before a roast pigeon files into it."

— Danish Proverb

 
   
 
 

"A Thaum is the basic unit of magical strength. It has been universally established as the amount of magic needed to create one small white pigeon or three normal-sized billiard balls."

— Terry Pratchett

 

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If you know of a funny pigeon quote that I missed, please email it to me. Provide the text of the quote and who said it; and, if you have it, a reference where we can verify the text and the spelling of the person's name (a web page address, Bartlett's, etc.). So... email me a quote. Thanks!

 

Feed Your Brain!
AUDIO CLIPS
ANIMAL WELFARE AND SPECIES

CATEGORY:  SPECIES — 07.JUL.2014

Rating: 3 of 5 - Good, worth a listen Living on Earth

WildLeaks Set to Catch Poachers — WildLeaks is a new information-sharing platform that collects anonymous tips about wildlife poaching, illicit buying and selling of species, and illegal deforestation. Founder Andrea Crosta tells explains how WildLeaks is helping fight wildlife crime and prosecute the people involved.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   5:51

GP comment:  Good idea.

Original Show Pub Date: 04.Jul.2014

CATEGORY:  SPECIES, CLIMATE — 24.JUN.2014

Rating: 3 of 5 - Good, worth a listen Uprising

As Ocean Acidity Rises, Will Phytoplankton Health Fall? — Microscopic ocean creatures called phytoplankton produce an astonishing 60 percent of the Earth’s oxygen and they occupy the crucial bottom rung of our world’s ocean food chain. The survival of most life on this planet depends on healthy phytoplankton. Researcher William Cochlan discusses a new study that is attempting to predict the likely impact to phytoplankton from rising CO2 and ocean acidity levels. Though results are still unfolding, it appears that some phytoplankton turn more toxic in a higher acidity environment and, in turn, harm the shellfish and other marine animals that feed on them.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   21:06

GP comment:  Ocean impact is one of the more worrying effects of humanity's continuing mismanagement of the planet.

Original Show Pub Date: 18.Jun.2014

CATEGORY:  SPECIES — 19.JUN.2014

Rating: 3 of 5 - Good, worth a listen Quirks and Quarks

Tree Swallows Have Winter of Discontent — Many species of birds that feed on airborne insects are in decline. Not only are their numbers diminishing, but the size of the remaining birds, particularly breeding females, has also been shrinking. Dr. Sebastien Rioux Paquette has been studying one of these birds, the tree swallow, in its summer habitat in Quebec. He's found that summer forage doesn't seem to be a problem for the swallows; the issue seems to be declines in insect prey in their wintering ground in the US and Mexico. Pesticides and shrinking habitat for insects due to agricultural intensification are depleting the swallows' winter food, and the birds are suffering as a result.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   8:34

GP comment:  Industrial agriculture—hard to like from any perspective.

Original Show Pub Date: 24.May.2014

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Funny Pigeon Quotes

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