"I don't go to the gym or practice yoga. And the closest thing I have to a nutritionist is the Carlsberg Beer Company. I just have the appetite of a pigeon."

— Colin Farrell

"Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue."

— Dilbert [Scott Adams]

"France has found a unique way of controlling its unwanted critter population. They have done this by giving unwanted animals like snails, pigeons, and frogs fancy names, thus transforming common backyard pests into expensive delicacies. These are then served to gullible tourists, who will eat anything they can't pronounce."

— Chris Harris

"The only difference between a pigeon and the American farmer today is that a pigeon can still make a deposit on a John Deere."

— Jim Hightower

"I think people should mate for life, like pigeons or Catholics."

— Woody Allen

Have you ever noticed:
When you're feeling really good,
There's always a pigeon
That'll come shit on your hood;
Or you're feeling your freedom
And the world's off your back—
Some cowboy from Texas
Starts his own war in Iraq.

— John Prine

"I already shred all my mail. What am I supposed to do now? Use pay phones? Smoke signals? Train pigeons? There's no such thing as privacy anymore."

— Dennis Adams

"I don't mind being a symbol but I don't want to become a monument. There are monuments all over the Parliament Buildings and I've seen what the pigeons do to them."

— Tommy Douglas

"A man must keep his mouth open a long while before a roast pigeon files into it."

— Danish Proverb

"A Thaum is the basic unit of magical strength. It has been universally established as the amount of magic needed to create one small white pigeon or three normal-sized billiard balls."

— Terry Pratchett