FUNNY ADVERTISING QUOTES

"Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it."

— Stephen Leacock

"Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission."

— Fred Allen

"Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does."

— Steuart H. Britt

"Society drives people crazy with lust and calls it advertising."

— John Lahr

"Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is I don't know which half."

— John Wanamaker

"We grew up founding our dreams on the infinite promise of American advertising. I still believe that one can learn to play the piano by mail and that mud will give you a perfect complexion."

— Zelda Fitzgerald

"Advertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on."

— Jerry Della Femina

"Advertising is tax deductible, so we all pay for the privilege of being manipulated and controlled."

— Noam Chomsky

"Advertising &8211; a judicious mixture of flattery and threats."

— Northrop Frye

"Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need."

— Will Rogers

"Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless."

— Sinclair Lewis

"What is the difference between unethical and ethical advertising? Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public; ethical advertising uses truth to deceive the public."

— Vilhjalmur Stefansson

"Advertising is the art of making whole lies out of half truths."

— Edgar A. Shoaff

"When a man throws an empty cigarette package from an automobile, he is liable to a fine of $50. When a man throws a billboard across a view, he is richly rewarded."

— Pat Brown

"You can fool all the people all the time—if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough."

— Joseph E. Levine

From American Beauty  (1999)

Lester Burnham: "Brad, for 14 years I've been a whore for the advertising industry. The only way I could save myself now is if I start firebombing."

From Annie Hall  (1977)

Alvy Singer [on Pam being a Rosicrucian]: "I can't get with any religion that advertises in Popular Mechanics."

From TV's Most Censored Moments  (2002 Documentary)

David Milch: "An advertiser doesn't mind going out on a limb—if they feel that there's a constituency for the limb."

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"The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in."

— Yakov Smirnoff

"You know why Madison Avenue advertising has never done well in Harlem? We're the only ones who know what it means to be Brand X."

— Dick Gregory

"Don't tell my mother I work in an advertising agency. She thinks I play piano in a whorehouse."

— Jacques Seguela