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FUNNY NEWS IN JOKES-CARTOONS FORMAT, FAKE NEWS, WEIRD NEWS, MADE-UP NEWS

ZOMBIE
NEWSCLIPS
FROM THE TOMB
OF THE UNREAL,
Volume 2

   1986      FLEABAGGED

Thirty cats are seized from the home of a Wisconsin woman during a raid by animal control authorities. The woman says she realized that 30 cats was way over the four-cat-per-household limit, but adds, "I asked them to leave—I pleaded. But hey—they're CATS."

   1992      SMOKE GETS IN YOUR AYES

Always a sucker for a popular theme, Congress jumps on the tobacco-bashing bandwagon by announcing that its members will no longer be allowed to throw up smokescreens during press conferences.

   1993      HOOKING THE PIRATES

In each of the years prior to 1993, modern-day pirates attack dozens of ships in the waters near Singapore, Malaysia and Indonesia. In 1993, attacks are down dramatically. Officials credit the decline to an undercover program in which agents frequent port-city bars, tell jokes, and arrest those responding with "Hardy-har-har."

Funny cartoon of zombie newsman
 
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TerraBits

Winston Buttle
      — New York, New York
"I'm upset about the news that the city is using a system of traffic cameras to catch speeders. I'm even more disturbed to hear that they're using the ticket revenue to begin construction of a new road, The Big Brother Parkway."


How do we avoid a future of everybody sitting in traffic on the Sprawl 'n' Crawl Freeway?
Take the short cut to the next page

Funny cartoon of boy on tricycle getting speeding ticket

     Or go to main jokes/cartoons page  |  More zombie cartoons

 
 

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SONGS FOR A FUTURE PASSED
 
  “1984” – David Bowie, from the album Diamond Dogs
 
  album cover for David Bowie, Diamond Dogs

I'm looking for a vehicle, I'm looking for a ride
I'm looking for a party, I'm looking for a side
I'm looking for the treason that I knew in '65
Beware the savage roar ... Of 1984

George Orwell meets David Bowie in this caustic but excellent song-critique. Get it here with other Bowie standouts like "Rebel Rebel," "Big Brother," and "Diamond Dogs."

 

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Copyright 2004 © Mark Jeantheau — All rights reserved.   More info